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But did it kill you???

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Let me get off from my proverbial soap box before I fall off and hurt myself! 

This post was meant to be about straight up COMPLAINING. 
But then I realized that it surely seems like I am complaining about complaining. 
Full circle. haha. 

Lately, I've found myself distanced from people who have so much to moan about and nothing positive to share. 
Now, I'm not saying that I am perfect and do not have my fair share of Moana Lisa moments. 
On the contrary, I know that I am really good at venting, and feel much better once I get it off my chest. 
But I choose my Ventilator (see what I did there) wisely - it's almost always the same person (my husband) and I share knowing that it's to get it off my chest or to ask for advice and most importantly that I can confide in him and it will not leave the room! (Or else that just makes it dirty, ugly gossip)

I almost NEVER vent on social media and try my best to keep other people out of it - especially if it's about something another person did. I mean, why would I want to be the reason why other people change their opinions or the way they feel about someone else? Why would I want to create a negative image of someone else, to people who are unrelated to my hurt/feelings/the situation? I think that it is very selfish to bad mouth one person to another. Not only are you speaking negativity over someone’s life, but you are also wrongly influencing someone else. 

And besides for that: why moan at all? 
Yes, life can be hard... people can be mean... situations can rock you... 
But did it kill you???? 
What good is your negative word vomit going to do to the situation? 
Life and death is in the power of the tongue - the Bible says so in Prov 18:21
This means that you have the power to create with your own mouth! 
You can choose whether you want to speak blessing or curses over others - which may seem a bit "Liewe Heksie", but by that I am referring to speaking positivity vs speaking negativity. 

I found this nice little write up on markmerill.com that speaks about filtering what comes out of your mouth: 

1. Do I have good motives? Is my reason for saying it beneficial to the listener or only for selfish purposes? I have to be careful on this one. There have been many times in my life that I’ve said something that is very true, but I only said it so someone will be impressed with me or because I was trying to manipulate them to do something for me.

2. Does it build up? Words are not neutral. They either tear down or build up. They are either hurtful or helpful. It makes me sad that I’ve let my hurtful words toward my wife and children pass through this filter all too often.

3. Is it confidential? Growing up, my dad stressed to me the importance of confidentiality. If someone tells me something in confidence, my job is to make sure I don’t ever mention it to another person.

4. If the person I am speaking about was present, would they be pleased with my words? You’ve heard this one before, but it’s always worth remembering. We should always honor other people whether they are with us or not.

5. Is it true? Truth trumps all. If it’s not true, don’t say it.

Something to think about today! 
I, certainly, have a lot to repent about and am definitely going to be more aware of what comes out of my mouth! :) 

#SpeakLife
#ThinkPositiveThoughts
#BlessOthers

 xxxL

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